[ July 2020 ]
“Just wanted to thank you all for providing this information online. I found your website when I was researching how to go about keeping my mother’s body at home after she died on hospice. She wanted us to hold a vigil based loosely on Buddhist tradition.

“I was able to get the ice packs you recommended and was well prepared for when she did eventually pass this past Monday. Everything turned out beautifully. We kept her at home with us for almost 24 hours with no problems at all. It was an amazing gift for family and friends to be able to come and sit with her after she died. Everyone was deeply moved by it.

“Thanks for your work and for providing such a wonderful resource online.”

[ April 2020 ]
“I can’t tell you how often I have spoken with deep gratitude about what you did for David and me after his death — that time when everything in the world was shutting down, everyone was in fear, but you showed up with calm lovingkindness and skill to wash his body, show me and our aide Marilyn how to manage the ice packs, feed me soup and tuck me into bed myself. Your loving touch remains an extraordinary gift in this time when we mourners can’t be hugged by anyone.

“Those quiet days and nights at home alone with David were profoundly valuable to me. It was nothing like the family vigil that we had planned, but it gave me time to take in the reality of his death and to have last conversations with him until there was nothing left unsaid. The afternoon before his burial, Marilyn and I were able to perform the last ritual washing of his body with the Jewish prayers being said by Zoom. Mount Auburn Cemetery was no longer allowing shroud burials, but John & Jake at Anderson-Bryant brought a beautiful pine box that felt perfect. Their team was infinitely kind, as you said, in moving David’s body to the casket and transporting it to the cemetery, with neighbors lined up in vigil outside as they left the house. Even though only ten of us could be at graveside, many others watched remotely, at that time when we were all figuring out how to do our mourning rituals long-distance. The simplicity and directness of the green burial were everything that we had hoped.

“I am sad that your powerful work must mostly be on hold for now, and that the ice packs in my freezer will have to wait some months before serving the next home funeral. I hope that you are finding ways to continue coaching families to take back the intimacy of the dying process. Just your words “Death is not an emergency; there’s no hurry to call anyone” were so empowering for me. The lasting trauma for countless families of being separated from their loved ones dying of COVID-19 I predict will make the emotional / spiritual value of your work even more evident once this pandemic eases.

“Yours gratefully, Sharon Bauer”

“[I] wanted to thank you for your assistance during the difficult time last week. What you made possible for us was extremely moving to me. I decorated my mom with lace, silks and roses and other flowers. I heard from so many how beautiful and peaceful she looked. Being able to spend several lengths of time with her was very meaningful to me as well as the intimate wake and funeral service we did. This experience truly helped me transition and accept the change that had occurred. Much more than I was expecting. Thank you.”

“Thank you so much for your support and love throughout this very challenging time in my life. I am especially grateful for your presence at the hospital and support in bringing Roger home. It was important to do that and it would not have happened without you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. It has helped with my healing, my daughters, family and friends.”

“It’s been almost 8 weeks since my mother’s death. I have a very strong belief that people come into your life when you need them. Some stay around, some only pass through, but none the less make an impact. I feel there was some great power at work when you walked into my parents house that day. We were facing the biggest challenge any of us had ever faced and the only thing that made sense was the gift that you presented to us. None of us would ever be ready to lose our mom. She was the most loving, supportive, kind, uplifting woman this world would see and to be able to have her around longer, even in her death. Was a gift I will never forget. By showing us how to care for her in her death, as we had in her life, you allowed us to begin our grieving process with her, not away from her. That gift was, and continues to be, invaluable.

“I have one specific memory of you that I’d like to share. We had all left the room after preparing mom and the space for guests. At one point I came back up to get something and you were sitting on a chair at the end of the bed, leaning forward with your elbows on your knees. You were looking intently at my mom and my immediate reaction was that you were connecting with her through her death. That is something she would have done for someone. In that moment I knew that you and my mom would have been friends. It reaffirmed for me our decision to have you help us.

“I hope you ae able to spread your gift to others and they trust that what you can give to them is invaluable. Thank you for all you have done.”

“Yesterday went well. We comfortably carried my sister’s body down the back stairs to her coffin which was on the back porch and the coffin was delivered to the crematorium in Trip’s truck. Walter, who oversees the cremation, is wonderful. We gathered at 2:00 for prayers and a farewell.

“It has been a wonderful journey. Thank you so much.”

“Thank you from our entire family for the gift of your presence at our mother’s days after death. We were literally transformed by the experience of keeping her body with us and continuing to care for her until her cremation. You were right when you told us it would soften the experience of loss and grief and it became perhaps the most important factor in our ability to move forward.

“So many friends and family commented on the unique and incredible experience of having a home wake. I have shared your highest praises with so many. I hope you find success and continue to offer such a beautiful gift to families in this most profound and intimate way. ”

“Peg’s presence and knowledge as well as her kind counseling at the time of our father’s death was so helpful. She guided us through what needed to be done and with clarity and calmness explained the choices we had.”